Found out somethings that really upset me.
I dug up th past to poison th present. It makes no sense.
I don't know why i still clutch onto things.
Give me time pls.
Sorry, i've destroyed th nice lady you portrayed in your mind.
I'm really really upset.
Dont ask me to consider. I cant think at this crucial moment, at this damn situation.
I din expect it to turn out this way, what you said is like, i cannt take it.
It sucks, really really sucks.
My life is like screwed up, things aren't going smoothly.
I want to stop my desire for him, i need to stop it.
Before i can consider what you've said.
Just give me time, i'm going to prove everyone wrong.

Dont tell me what to do, girlfriends/sisters/friends.
I need to be stubborn at this time, i cant listen to your advices.
I'm not venting my anger on you. I just need to pour everything out to someone&you were not listening to me. I was frustrated. I cant think.
When you received my text&called me, i knew you cared.
This time i will be right, proving you wrong. Let's stop th bickering&be back to th way we were before. I know you dont want to see me cry. I dont want to hurt myself too.
I'll listen to you&wont swear anymore. But girl, i'm not gonna follow your advice on holding on. I cant hold on to someone who keeps quiet for two damn weeks. I'm tired of waiting, i cant wait. Th feeling is awful. You said you understand. Did you? You kept arguing&said he's worth it. Like you've never met him before.
I've kept quiet&let you win th argument. You win alright? I dont want to continue th bickering.
Childhood friend, you are really impt to me. I really really hope you read this&understand why i have to do this.



Shit had happened&i'm really upset. I've cried over it, no doubt.

Falling out with your 11yrs friends dont really feel good.
& th argument is abt two guys. Its not that we cant understand each other.
I feel tht its just tht we wont listen to each other. When i've made up my mind to let go, she told me to hold on.

It's really tirring to hold on to something you cant have. Its like i got no response, nothing.
It feels really awful. I cant take it.

When your relationship in love goes wrongs, you turn to friends, when your relationship with friends goes wrong, who do you turn to?
I'm gg to indulge myslef with food&drown myself with liquor.
Bye - i'm feeling very fuck right now.
0447. I've made up my mind.